It's inevitable Hamilton will get an NHL team. The day I walk to their first home game, my life will be complete.
By Kevin Somers
Published October 23, 2009
I've lived in Hamilton as long as anywhere else and our two little hammers were born and raised here, so it's home. This is a great city and I can't imagine living elsewhere.
In two minutes, we can walk to the beautiful Bruce Trail that cuts through the wondrous Niagara Escarpment. There is a big park with an awesome toboggan hill just up the street. We can, easily, walk to the Chedoke golf course; one of the best municipal courses in Canada. There are public rinks, parks, and pools everywhere in Hamilton.
Obviously, Ticats rule; Argos suck!
Hamilton is safe and inexpensive. Dimwits and timid souls often refer to Hamilton as "scary," which is fine; it keeps them in suburbia, splurging, safely, on McMansions and commuter vehicles. (I wouldn't want those people in my community, anyway.)
Twisters, typhoons, tsunamis, and terrifying tremors are scarce in the Hammer and winters aren't too bad, either.
At a recent Fred Eaglesmith show, he was on stage talking about all the great music rocking out of Hamilton. There is an active, vibrant arts community here and anyone who reads Raise the Hammer regularly knows there are plenty of sharp cookies advocating for the city. Theatre Aquarius is a beautiful facility.
There are a few wankers polluting the streets and air, but compared to most places, Hamilton is a pretension free zone. I lament the Starbucks on Locke St. and put a curse on it.
Of course, the manufacturing sector in Hamilton is dying. At one point, this city built and bankrolled the whole country, but it's almost bust. I'm hopeful Hamilton will bounce back, to some degree. It has to. It's great to see Innovation Park get going.
The only thing missing from my meaningless, little, Hamilton life is an NHL team. I'd love to see a squad in Copps Coliseum and was really, really, really pulling for Jim Balsille.
Goodness doesn't always prevail in the short term, unfortunately, and the diminutive, duplicitous, disingenuous, devilish Gary Bettman, his bellicose, belligerent, blustering bully, Billy Daly, and the inept, infirmed, infantile, inert Toronto Maple Leafs conspired to keep Jim from putting a team where it belongs.
According to Jonathon Swift, a genius can be recognized when a confederacy of dunces conspires against him.
I had always been a Leaf's fan, but can no longer stomach the franchise. Their current GM, Brian Burke, is a loud-mouthed, American egomaniac. Their coach, Ron Wilson, is an insufferably arrogant, incompetent American egomaniac. Burke and Wilson are, obviously, trying to build Team USA in Toronto because most of their highest-paid players are useless Americans.
The colossally inept Leaf brass allowed it to happen, naturally. Forsaking Canadian players is not new to the Toronto Maple Leafs. For decades, they've drafted unwatchable, soft Euros instead of local lads. Just as the team in Quebec should be rechristened as the Montreal Sovereignty Associates, the Toronto franchise no longer has the right to put a maple leaf on their jersey.
Seeing the Leafs lose every year was tough, but when the franchise stuck it to Hamilton by using their greasy veto to prevent a team from coming here, it was too much to take, so I'm done with them.
My new oath: I solemnly swear that The Toronto Maple Leafs is the worst franchise in sports' history and I pray that they lose every game, forever and ever. Amen.
It's inevitable Hamilton will get an NHL team. The day I walk to their first home game, my life will be complete. Undoubtedly, I'll be sporting the franchise hat, sweater, and jacket. I might, even, wear face (war) paint.
The outcome? Certainly: Hamilton 10 - Toronto 0.
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